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Don’t let the gym become a way to avoid facing – or cover up – your insecurities.There’s a reason some gym rats actually still struggle with women – they’re taking care of their physiques, but not fully facing their insecurities internally. Not all, but most women will be far more attracted to a fat guy who’s confident and loves himself than a guy with ripped abs but still comes off as insecure.

Before I go any further, I know I’ll probably get comments from people claiming I’m politically incorrect/offensive/judgemental/rude etc for using the title ‘how fat guys can be attractive’, and who will therefore assume those things about me before fully reading this article or fully watching the associated video. I used it because ‘how fat guys can be attractive’ was one of the top auto-complete search terms on Google (try it!) that always looks for evidence that our current beliefs are accurate The intention of this is to stop us going crazy, but it can have unintended consequences if we don’t know about it Here’s an example of it working: An atheist and a person who believes in God both believe they are right about their belief.Because of their belief, they both look for evidence of their belief being correct, and their brains find evidence that supports their belief and makes them highly aware of it, and it hides or downplays evidence that undermines or conflicts with their belief.So if you’re a fat guy who’s confident in himself and good with sexual tension and connection (see videos below), then your weight isn’t going to be a deal breaker for the majority of women.However, if your weight is a reflection of poor health and bad habits taking care of yourself, then that WILL hurt your attractiveness to women – especially more confident girls – because at some level, you don’t fully like (love) yourself if you’re treating your body poorly and not taking care of yourself.Acknowledge that what you’ve been doing isn’t working and you need to do something differently to get a different result.2 – Realise that you have a ‘story’ of the reasons why you are unattractive and how you are a ‘victim’ and powerless to change it that you tell yourself.And if we don’t interact with women AT ALL…then we won’t be successful with them.The above actions then lead to poor results (or zero results) and then you say to yourself: “See! ”, and the belief gets reinforced and the problem continues. 1 – It’s often said that the ‘definition of madness’ is: to keep doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.Some people scurry off but many people stay back and ask me questions or listen to other people’s questions and hear the answers.At a recent event in Melbourne Australia, I was asked a very sincere question by an overweight man which really struck me and made me want to do everything I could to help.

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