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For entertainers eyeing the pecking order among ships and cruise lines, the Queen Mary 2 - Cunard Line was considered one of the most prestigious in the world. I was initially contracted for a six-month voyage with additional on-land rehearsals, but this was extended several times.

During the day it’s filled with passengers, but after hours the singers were allowed to sneak in and relax-a-vous.One night a castmate and I were heading to the steam room when we heard some unusual noises reverberating off the tiled walls.When we pushed the door open we were met by a couple well old enough to be our grandparents, indulging in a little fellatio fun. My poor friend lurched on the slick floor, grabbed for something to steady himself, and landed his hand on a set of false teeth that had been laid out on the bench.Then, at Christmas, someone decked the fish heads in little Santa hats.When I worked in 2008 I was making about ,000 a month -- a tidy haul, considering all my expenses were covered.When we arrived at the cruise terminal at Southampton, UK, I was overwhelmed at the vessel’s sheer mass.Looming 200 feet above the water, and four football fields long, the ship was a colossus.The officers (heads of departments, people involved in steering the ship) ordered freshly made food from a menu.The staff (entertainers, people in the office) were offered steam table grub, which was fairly grim but passable. The lowly engine workers and cleaners, who mainly hailed from the Philippines and India, were given mountains of rice and cuts of meat and fish that included pork knuckles, chicken feet, and fish heads.But I’ll spare you the months spent at sea and cut straight to the strangest stuff I saw onboard.You’ve heard the rumors and, yes, it’s true: Everyone working on your cruise ship is sleeping with everyone else. Love really can bloom in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean.


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